五年前，我上大一，從一個黃土高坡上的小縣城考到廣外，學(xué)外語，為了適應(yīng)英美國家文化，練聽力，我在學(xué)校FTP上追起了skins, 當(dāng)時真不懂怎么資本主義國家的孩子童年那么不幸福，小小年紀(jì)就酗酒吸毒亂搞性關(guān)系，沒有一個正常的溫馨的家庭生活。還是我們社會主義好。就像以前看《紅與黑》《包法利夫人》《茶花女》那樣，整個基調(diào)好消沉，資本主義國家，我還真的是一丁點(diǎn)都不羨慕。
    當(dāng)時先看的第三季，全劇就只喜歡fredie, 他在開學(xué)第一天課堂上表白的一幕好浪漫，但Effy后來的表現(xiàn)真叫人……， 哎，effy 的生活一塌糊涂，所以才和cook 一對， 他們兩個又可恨又可憐，當(dāng)時多希望看到effy 和fredie 終成眷屬啊，P.S. 配樂很好聽，有些劇情本來不是很懂的，給配樂這么一渲染，我好像就似懂非懂了。
    英劇的等待總是很漫長，我接著看了第一第二季，合著effy的哥哥比她還胡來，是叫nick 吧，覺得他很活該，亂搞，還勾引好朋友max，我最喜歡的當(dāng)然是sid和cassie了吧，他們，和別的孩子的頹廢不一樣，是可以從他們身上看到希望的那種，cassie不吃飯，讓我好心疼，sid很窩囊，當(dāng)兩個人在一起就會變得不一樣，愛情的力量就是如此吧，它可以給你希望，給你光明，改變你的生命。呵呵，我童話看太多了。
    第四季出來時，我大三吧，結(jié)局出來時我快砸掉電腦了，為什么會這樣，社會怎么是這個樣子的，很想說臟話，想罵人，成人的世界真的比我們想像的要復(fù)雜，要骯臟。真不想長大，不想長大變得和那些成人同流合污。
     第五第六季，看了一集，沒感，演員劇情沒有深入我的內(nèi)心，果斷棄劇，直到 昨天，在豆瓣英劇排行榜上看到第七季出來，而且還是頭四季的老演員，我立馬加班加點(diǎn)把六集看完了。
     談?wù)劯惺?，五年了，我好像第一次真正看懂了，不知是因?yàn)槲议L大了成熟了，理解能力強(qiáng)了，還是因?yàn)橹袊某扇耸澜绾陀脑絹碓浇咏?，所以我終于深有同感了。職場的潛規(guī)則，人吃人，看到effy穿職業(yè)裝努力在工作應(yīng)酬，真的很不習(xí)慣，我們都會因一時錯亂迷了雙眼，忽略了身邊更重要的一切，最后的牢獄之災(zāi)反倒是件好事，監(jiān)獄，醫(yī)院，精神病院，戒毒所，這些好像本來就是effy的歸宿似的，至少，她找到自己了，可喜可賀。cassie， 還記得她的“wow”嗎，那個瘦瘦地總不肯吃飯的女孩終于胖了一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)了，很開心能再次看到她，而且她還是那么的……pure, 那種靈氣還在，而且更加懂事，為家庭承擔(dān)責(zé)任，恩，好孩子，我喜歡。 cook, 這個我曾經(jīng)最鄙視的人，進(jìn)了販毒團(tuán)伙，搞了老大的女朋友，被發(fā)現(xiàn)以后帶著兩位女友亡命天涯。但他還是改變了，而且，是我看到的這一季改變最大，人物刻畫的最好的一個，至于他的未來會怎樣，我倒是放心了，因?yàn)樗呀?jīng)徹頭徹尾地長大了。

一天兩季的節(jié)奏，刷完了皮囊，停不下來的想要看完。

第一二季的時候喚起了好多關(guān)於大英國的回憶，依然像藏在心底的真愛一樣，對其無法釋懷。

第三四季出現(xiàn)了全劇最愛的一對couple，Naomi和Emily，經(jīng)歷了出柜以及後來的各種shit，最終還是毫無懸念的在一起了，只是吵鬧分和的過程實(shí)在讓人揪心的虐。特別讓人安心的一對兒，覺得不管發(fā)生什麼她們都不會分開。尤其是第四季第二集裡面的兩機(jī)車少女簡直是全劇最愛的一段！

第五六季不太喜歡，第三屆小孩裡面，F(xiàn)ranky的逆襲簡直不能接受，太突然轉(zhuǎn)變太大。Mini簡直就是美劇誤入。男生們也很pussy，Cook就是American Pie里面的Stiff。

第七季，孩子們長大了。後媽編劇讓Naomi得了cancer。。。虐哭



過了兩天了，還覺得陷在劇情里面無法自拔。雖然高中生活沒有劇中那么頹喪的drugs啊葉子啊party啊，但是也夠混亂了。比起美劇中那些高中生，skins孩子們的高中才是真正的青春！

五六季只強(qiáng)忍著看了一集，受不了爆炸頭和異裝癖這些小losers的中二生活，覺得簡直是蠢。
無比想念愛翻白眼兒的Michelle和到處打架的Cook，想念Tony的裸體床單，想念Cassie說「lovely」時候的笑，想念第二季結(jié)束時葬禮上的禮花，想念Cook的小虎牙和Effy的藍(lán)色眼睛。

然后有一天，聽說你們長大了。

【DUST】
開頭，Effy被女主管吆來喝去盜用idea的時候，我一丁點(diǎn)也不同情她。因?yàn)槲抑肋@是Effy，她會用她的方式讓所有人payback。
于是我十分欣慰并且不出所料的看到了Effy利用追求她的小矮子的數(shù)據(jù)倒賣股票當(dāng)上了優(yōu)秀交易員，并且成功的搞上了大boss搞走了女主管。
長大了的Effy一如既往的所向披靡四處通途，似乎能讓人忘記了她曾崩潰在陽光下的草地上，把自己反鎖在浴室里手腕上的血鋪滿半個地板。
她有了車有了司機(jī)，有了租倫敦大公寓的錢，Naomi看著她陪客戶賭博時年老的客戶搭上Effy肩膀的手說「你竟然不覺得惡心」時，Effy終于融入了這個成年人的世界，金錢，股票，期貨，債券，倫敦金融街，男上司，老客戶。
只是Effy的眼睛還是那么藍(lán)，她不明白這不再是那個她僅憑自己就能壓倒一切的世界，這個世界里，有欺騙和利用，也有法律和規(guī)則——盡管可笑，可是你得遵守它。
其實(shí)我沒想到這個故事會這樣結(jié)尾——我是說從金融街開始——沒有想到那個誰都瞧不起的女孩會乖乖的變成一個交易員，我有那么一丁點(diǎn)兒想念曾經(jīng)cares about nothing的Effy，盡管我知道這可能才是合理的結(jié)局。
至于最后Effy的熟悉的笑容，雖然看起來沒什么不同，但是總有些什么是再也找不回來了的。這話是廢話，但是我找不到更好的表達(dá)。
這次她沒贏，真令人沮喪。那個queen一樣的Effy竟然沒贏。
flame to dust，好像游戲里的利劍拿到現(xiàn)實(shí)世界只是一串代碼，這另人沮喪。

【FAME】
如果說有什么比Effy成為交易員更讓人哭笑不得的，那大概就是Cassie成了咖啡廳女招待吧。
她穿著暗藍(lán)色的工作服，頭發(fā)梳了起來，住在一棟亂糟糟的公寓里，甚至跟別人說「我不怎么抽煙」。
不知道為什么，我一直對Cassie在剛出場時手腕上當(dāng)作手鏈來戴的一個大兔子塑膠發(fā)圈念念不忘，好像是粉色或者橘色，款式就是中國的街邊小店里最常見的那種一個塑膠的兔子腦袋。Cassie戴著那個發(fā)圈，胡亂的往嘴里塞illegal的藥片，她站在長椅上，假裝要飛起來，她沖所有人笑，說「Safe」和「Lovely」。
那是我在頭兩季中最喜歡的角色，我不知道她為什么能那么美好而無辜，就像她衣服上的小鴨子和手上的發(fā)圈一樣。
雖然如今，她只是將「我曾經(jīng)試圖將自己餓死」一筆帶過的當(dāng)一件奇聞異事講出來。
而她在想要逃離海邊的狼狽的父親的同時，也在逃離曾經(jīng)那么狼狽卻美好易碎的自己。
于是再沒有聽到她說一句「Lovely」。
也開始有男人為她打架了，也開始有人注意到她的美了，我不合時宜的想起來Sid，Sid你還記得Cassie么？
我總幻想著Cassie在街頭能遇到誰，Tony，Michelle，或者Sid。
或者Sid。
我大概還是那種學(xué)不會明白舊日情懷都是檔案館里的碎紙片的人，拎出來看可能會沾一手灰，并且并不能夠繼續(xù)。
Cassie一句話帶過的東西太多了，好在她還是會站在窗口，假裝要飛。

【DOWN】
Cook是我一開始特別討厭的一個角色，不知道為什么，就是討厭他，看見他就想按快進(jìn)。
后來有一集我忘了什么前因后果，Naomi跟Cook說「You just live a bit harder than everybody else does」，于是我很沒出息的又看劇看哭了。
可能討厭Cook是因?yàn)槲以谒砩峡吹搅俗约旱挠白樱阂驗(yàn)樘诤跛耘略庥鰝εc背叛所以裝作什么都不在乎，最后搞得大家都討厭他的什么也不在乎而讓他陷入新一輪循環(huán)那就是索性把事情搞得更糟糕，到最后明明全身心的碎的七零八落卻還是一副so what的樣子。
a bit harder，哈，a bit harder。
我唯一覺得讓我滿意的結(jié)局，竟然在Cook身上，終于看到他露出了「I care」的神情，終于看到他選擇了一次逃避，然后是悶悶的英腔畫外音。
我知道你不會再把事情搞得更糟，我知道你終于有了恐懼。
其實(shí)想說一句特別矯情的話，有了恐懼，也就有了愛的能力了不是么。

于是血肉橫飛的現(xiàn)實(shí)世界，狠狠地甩給中二病們一記響亮的耳光。

       第一次看skins是09年，那年我大二，當(dāng)時已經(jīng)出到了第三季。有個朋友很喜歡這部劇，也一直推薦我看。一天逛校園資源論壇的時候看到一個1-2季的合輯時候，下載完才開始看。當(dāng)時年輕些，和多數(shù)人看到的一樣，覺得skins就是講一群荷爾蒙分泌旺盛的青少年，開了一場青春狂歡的爬梯。在這些角色和情結(jié)中，我們可以代入很多，比如對酒精的沉迷，對性愛的追求，甚至對大麻和煙草的依賴，還有如Cassie對Sid無可奈何的Forever love。那時我希望自己可以和他們一樣，對家庭和父母的期待無所顧忌，甚至背離宗教和信仰，不管學(xué)校，不顧未來，只為青春，只為狂歡。
       從第三季開始，在評論下說要棄劇的人越來越多。我們對每兩季換一批角色的設(shè)定不習(xí)慣，也更愿意相信第一二季的角色并沒有離開。但是即便嫌棄，也這么兩季兩季的看下來了，并且越看越清晰。我開始認(rèn)為編劇父子不僅僅是在講荷爾蒙而已，而每兩季都會有人死去，更像是編劇試圖在以這種深刻的方式敘述他們想要對世界和青少年的看法。
       不和睦的家庭、精神疾病、性取向、藥物濫用和死亡，每一個話題單獨(dú)拎出來都很沉重，skins把它們都囊括進(jìn)來。在第六季中Mini看著寶寶的那個掙扎表情，讓我震驚到流淚。每個人心底都懷著最純真的善意，對家人，對后代，這些感情都能夠在每一季中看到。Mini父母離異，她的媽媽經(jīng)常和不同的男人來往，甚至在家里大聲做愛。她從破處開始就面臨著選擇，被朋友甚至男朋友認(rèn)可，還是做一個特立獨(dú)行的處女。Mini之后懷孕走投無路找到爸爸，習(xí)慣逃脫責(zé)任的爸爸成最后一點(diǎn)希望，卻最終也將她置于不顧。Alo從得知Mini懷孕之后被驚嚇到躲起來，Mini一個人去墮胎的時候看著寶寶的樣子強(qiáng)忍著眼淚還是哭了出來。原本，Mini的家庭可以不破裂，她可以成為一個很優(yōu)秀的女生，她可以不懷孕，她可以不要去面對要不要生下小孩的抉擇。家庭破裂是被選擇的，擁有怎樣的青春是自己選擇的，進(jìn)行有保護(hù)措施的性愛是可以選擇的，生小孩是一切選擇之后產(chǎn)生的選擇。所以，skins這些戲，這些一個個的悲劇和短暫的狂歡，是源于我們自己一個又一個的選擇。
        翻skins的照片，除了很多人說棄劇，還有很多人說第七季爛?？墒莝kins究竟講的是什么，是嬉皮，是大麻，是酒精，是性，是青春，是狂歡？每個人都有自己的解讀。Skins是這一切，又不僅僅是這一切。我們的青春的狀態(tài)，源于家庭，源于社區(qū)，源于社會，也終究源于自己。如果家庭完整些，如果不是管教太寬松或是太嚴(yán)格，他們不會想要從傳統(tǒng)中剝離出來。如果學(xué)校負(fù)責(zé)職業(yè)規(guī)劃的大姐能再專業(yè)些，沒準(zhǔn)能安排好幾個學(xué)生的生計。如果對愛情能夠有所理解，Sid對Cassie的愛應(yīng)該會有更多的回應(yīng)。男孩特別是盧瑟爾對女神模樣的女孩情有獨(dú)鐘，好像流了很多年的哈喇子，一旦有機(jī)會一定要上位，并且有多久待多久，還必須的念念不忘，特別驕傲。不管Cassie對他的愛有多深，似乎也看不到Cassie身上的美。諷刺的是，Cassie在第七季成了一位萬眾矚目的模特。
       我很喜歡第七季，我覺得第七季升華了skins一直在敘述的龐雜的青春軼事。青春時期因?yàn)楦鞣N原因，他們選擇了一種極端開放的姿態(tài)綻放青春，甚至因此而被逼面對死亡。第七季中，曾經(jīng)年輕的人不再年少，Effy開始穿得像office lady，精通Excel，和boss打得火熱。雖然在煩心的夜晚也會換上衣服去夜店跳一跳，但是Effy已經(jīng)長大了，她和每個人一樣都長大了。她不再因?yàn)閯e人的選擇而精神分裂，她的生活開始由自己掌控。她選擇怎么對待愛她的人和她愛的人，而她選擇和大多數(shù)的年輕女孩一樣，對帥氣多金的boss情有獨(dú)鐘，利用愛她的可憐男孩取得情報，并且被boss利用完之后拋棄，以及讓愛她的男孩潰不成軍。這些都是她自己選擇的結(jié)果。很多人接受不了Effy蹲號子，但你可以是Effy，你在你長大之后，在你面對這種利益抉擇的時候，能夠拿她做反面例子，做另一個正確的選擇，那么Effy這個號子就蹲得有價值。
       對Cassie在第七季中的故事，還是沒能給安排一個真愛，多少是有些怨念的。但是大家都挺開心的，畢竟大家心愛的女神成了模特，前途明朗。仔細(xì)想想，Cassie在很多時候都很冷靜，比如即便孤獨(dú)也拒絕濫交，以及在第一次為高端雜志做模特時拒絕中年多金男的毒品，少有朋友卻不過多參與妓女鄰居的邀請。她的生活并沒有糟到?jīng)]辦法解開，她有美而不自知的特質(zhì)，并且心系家庭。這樣的女孩應(yīng)該得到幸運(yùn)的眷顧，而且編劇確實(shí)是這么做的。
       Cook的故事很沉重，在前面他為Freddie殺死一位變態(tài)的心理醫(yī)生，并在第七季中一邊逃亡一邊做一位毒販子。逃亡的時間，Cook有很多思考的時間，編劇也把他從沒大腦的種馬轉(zhuǎn)變?yōu)橛兴枷胗袚?dān)當(dāng)?shù)哪腥?。Cook在第七季中面對了很多艱難的選擇，并且每一個選擇都能將他指向險要的境地。Charlie要Cook和他做愛，Cook第一次拒絕免去他一開始的殺身之禍，第二次因?yàn)镃harlie提起他的往事沒有拒絕，卻將她這個定時炸彈綁在了身邊，并最終害死了相愛的Emma。但Cook沒有再殺死boss，是對此前殺人罪行的自我救贖。
        結(jié)局很多人不喜歡，因?yàn)閯那啻褐衅?，就?yīng)該從青春中落。比如青春應(yīng)該完美，Effy不應(yīng)該蹲號子；青春應(yīng)該有愛情，Cassie應(yīng)該和Sid團(tuán)聚；青春應(yīng)該張揚(yáng)跋扈，Cook應(yīng)該殺死boss并且和bitch私奔。但這一切都沒有發(fā)生，因?yàn)槲覀兂砷L了，我們應(yīng)該思考，做出一些正確的選擇，為自己的人生開路。

       Cook最后的獨(dú)白

you think you know death
but you don't
until you've seen it
really seen it
and it gets under your skin and lives inside you

you also think you know life
you stand on the edge of things and watch it go by
but you are not living it
not really
you're just a tourist
a ghost
and then you see it
really see it
and it gets under your skin and lives inside you

and there's no escape
there's nothing to be done, and you know what?
it's good, it's a good thing
and that's all I've got to say about it.

不再年輕?？赐赀@6集感覺很無力，很抑郁。

生命和生活在英語里同為一詞。生命可以成長，可以老去；生活可以如盛花燦爛，可以如落紅不堪。這一季的他們，恰若落地繁花，最張揚(yáng)的青春已經(jīng)成為過去，未來如同蒙住了的臟抹布，不能聞，不可視。

劇已經(jīng)爛了，以致于我的不開心。抑郁，卻是因?yàn)槲业难矍耙彩且粔K臟抹布。

第一代skins的演員們和我年齡相當(dāng)，那段青春自然也是skins陪我度過，片頭曲是我那時的手機(jī)鈴聲，今日再聽，依舊百感交集，泫然欲泣。

第一代的片頭曲清澈簡潔，視頻迷幻中不乏青澀質(zhì)樸；而Emily的第二代，片頭制作只得上代的皮毛。

到了Mini的第三代，電音里多了些壓抑沉重；劇情和拍攝中刻意為之的感覺愈發(fā)嚴(yán)重，雖然內(nèi)心十分偏愛Mini，也沒將這兩季看完。

Mini是身量高挑，明艷俏麗的典型蘇格蘭美女，整臉的雀斑嚇壞了不少國人；大笑的時候嘴角快碰到耳朵，倒也別有一番風(fēng)味。

她外表時髦、強(qiáng)勢，有時口出惡言，肩膀?qū)捤闹L，想來打架也尋不到敵手。

皮囊不過裝飾，Mini的內(nèi)心膽怯脆弱，高興起來跳舞，簡直像是猴子在雜耍，透著一股傻勁。

承蒙抬愛，現(xiàn)實(shí)生活中曾有數(shù)人稱贊我與她相像，可我不認(rèn)為他們了解我，或是Mini。

現(xiàn)在有了最終季，暫時還不得時間觀看，也心存恐懼——我們一起放肆過的青春，只怕和太陽下的泡沫消散的一樣迅速。

生離死別、自食其力、人情世故、有沒有把你們眼中無知又無畏的光芒抹去？

一定有。

皺紋從不可怕，可怕的是人心。



后來在倫敦念書，落地一個月之后便以為朋友慶生的名義前往布里斯托。

和想象中不大一樣，這座城市算是英國的大都市之一，也比較工業(yè)化。市中心看起來敞敞亮亮，全不似英格蘭其他城市小家碧玉般的做派。白天日光充足，干凈且寧靜；有教堂，有涂鴉，有迷你又現(xiàn)代的碼頭，有波光粼粼的一小片海；到了晚間，酒精流氓們紛紛出動，他們湊到你耳邊贊你美麗，手指停在你腰間，想要和你跳舞；喝到爛醉的人則不停地想要挑逗撫摸你，粗魯者直接動手動腳。幸運(yùn)的話，他們中的一些人總能get laid，其余的便在嘔吐物與咒罵聲中醉到日上三竿。

天佑英格蘭，這一年的留學(xué)生活讓我見識到了五花八門、神出鬼沒般的搭訕方式。

扯遠(yuǎn)了，回到倫敦不久，官方便公布Mini這一代要拍攝final party，誠邀各地的小伙伴們前往布里斯托助興。

我和班上的德國姑娘都很想去，無奈課程安排，兩人的英語那時又都是半斤八兩，也沒辦成railway card，車票錢對于窮學(xué)生不算小數(shù)目，最終沒能成行。

而我從布里斯托帶回來的巫女掃帚在離開OPAL 4的時候也被我無奈丟入了垃圾桶。



還記得我們最愛的、總是找不到人生平衡的Cassie嗎？她后來就讀于劍橋的皇后學(xué)院，現(xiàn)在已經(jīng)畢業(yè)，在GOT中贏得了一個長線角色。

真好。

這篇寫完，我會把電話鈴聲再次換回第二季的片頭曲。

青春總要散場，我也無法生活在回憶中，但鈴聲響起時內(nèi)心有愉悅和鈍痛，這樣也好。

這樣也好。

Effy's going to jail, Naomi's going to die, Emily's going to be even worse than death. Most of the viewer of the last episode of skins, cannot cope with tragic endings like that, including me at least for a while. For me, personally, it's not the death or prison that bothers the most, it is the non-dramatic way of telling almost nonchallently, of the most tragic ending that one can think of is happening right in front our eyes while pretend not a big deal of it. Instead of showing meanings to us, all is simply impled by. Those viewers seek for some kinda closure of the whole skins series aren't gonna get it, for there left so many lose ends; those who hope for drama aren't gonna get it, disappointed by its realistic telling of dramatic event and its anti-clamax of an ending; Those who expect twists and turns would surprise and flip at the extreme lack of it. Despite all that, we should decide to love it, after all that is the end we get in life.

The first thing needs to be clarified is that television becomes no less inferior than literature these days, at least for some good television shows like Skins, it is true. A fact we need to come to terms with. And as no sensible readers would curse the writer and demand him to rewrite an ending that he doesn't like, television is not an negotiation as well. For those who think it is, well you are so self-involved to hook on the delusion of it. That's the sole lie the life-shows nowadays are depending on you to believe, a conviction that the power's in your own hand. For Christ sake, what a convenient flattering that is! As sensible viewers, we see right through it, we accept what we got and try to appreciate the beauty of it.

After all, Skins fire. As the title suggests, it is about lights, destruction and rebirth. And a terrible beauty is born. Adulthood is such a terrible beauty. Especially for Effy, once aloof, indifferent, omniscient goodness in her little circle, washed by fire, and reborn into human. Of course, there's some sacrifice along the way. So walking out of paradise full of drugs, parties and hormones, here she is, taking three steps of becoming human as we know it.

Step one, compassion.
"I want to feel something, I want to be hurt! Come and hit me!" The girl ran into the middle of the street and exclaimed a death wish in front of world. That's near the ending of Effy's teenage years, almost the last we see her. Since then, apparently, the wish has come true. In fire, we see Effy's feeling, invisible as it always is, all over the place. The way she bites her finger nails watching Naomi on stage doing shitty comedy and being laughed at, the way she cries when being yielded at the truth of Naomi's illness, the way she goes blank hearing the doctor said the drug doesn't work and the way stares Naomi lying on the CT scan thereafter runs out of room, and the way she panics holding Naomi in her arms puking all over the place-- we never have seen Effy going through all levels of emotions before, not merely for herself, but for her best friend, for Naomi and Emily. With herself, she can be tough, takes it on her own: "I am fine", when Naomi asks she used three words as such to conclude it, even if she's not. Far from doing nothing, as Naomi accuses her to be, she's doing everything she could to hold it together, being tough for her, can't stop feeling for her but has to conceal it for her. That is not sth she told us, That's sth we sense. For those who love Naomi and Emily with such a bias to take in everything they say, myself included, might look beyond the surface and see they are blocked by own individuality as well. In fact, compassion is all Effy is in fire, "she has such big love inside of her, just needs to be let out, and the possibility to let out scares the hell of her" Effy's mom knows her nature well. Well, at least she smiles at the end, typical Effy smile, as if to say "you don't know me at all", or maybe this time, it says: "I can feel after all, i feel something". Compassion we know that is what makes us all human, and from the moment she feels it, Effy is no longer mysterious and inappoachable fairie, she is one of us, human.

Step two, mortality.
Naomi's death really provided an occasion for mourning, mourning for the beauty being tragically destroyed. It is sad, true. But it is sensible, as we consider it. After all it becomes a tradition of skins, to kill one favorite character at a time of generation. And for generation 2, Freddie is definitely not the most favorite one. It is the thing had between Naomi and Emily that makes the most wonderful thing that the make-believe world of skins had created for us. And let's face it, the most beautiful thing as it always, is irreplacable. There's no carnation for that, no reborn in it (as they are lesbians) therefore, it is immortal. This is the reason they can't survive the mortal world of adulthood. One of them has to be destroyed, and the other along with it. And as if killing our favorite couple isn't cruel enough, Effy needs to witness and learn from the tragic of all this, to see the only positive unyielding love that exists in her past world being worn out by an incurable disease of mankind. From the moment her best friend told her the illness, Effy knows it's gonna go down like this, she knows it too well, so she can't stand watching Naomi pretend like nothing and make fun of herself in a comedy, yet she complains in the most minute ways, pissing Naomi about the rent which essentially means the burden all weighs down on her- she needs to be the rock, and it's fucking hard. Neither can she offer comforts to her like innocent Dom, cause she knew it better, the truth hurts so much that she can't fathom a way to act it otherwise. Again, like I said, Mortality takes its toll, for Effy, it is the farewell paid to the old world of her past with Naomily in it, a burning ritual she has to experience descending to the world of works in her fantasy, a brave new world of men. And Naomily is the sacrifice, given that Homosexuality implies in literature a longing for death in itself. The poet and beauty must die, so the rest of us can keep on living.

Step three, helplessness.
At times we can't help but wonder why things always go terribly wrong with Effy, no matter how fucking together they all seem in the first glimpse! The onmiscent soul of this childhood circle stumbles way out of their idealistic small world and find she's merely a tool used by more onmiscent forces way sophisticated than she is. Helplessness is the condition of humanity. It breaks her charm, make her helpless. Emily says: "We idolized her." Cook's fucking Dad: "You are too pretty for your own good, that's why you destroy everything you touch." Such are the contrast between surface and core of Effy. Lights and destruction all sealed in one, waiting to be born. And in skins fire, it burst alive. It is interesting to note that in retrospect, everyone around Effy ends in various tragic ways: her parents separated, her brother got hit by a car, Freddie got killed and Cook went down for his revenge, and we thought Naomily is the only exception for they are special, how naive we are! There's a certain helpless gravity for tragic in Effy that makes her so appealing and at once so heartending. It almost seems nothing stays with her, under circumstances like that one almost certainly can't help but hold itself to blame. God knows how she serectly took the fault herself for all lost in life! In front of the mass of life, for the first time, we see her had no clue about what to do? It is Naomi in sick bed push some sense in her again, "Seriously what do we got, Effy? Well, I am going to die, what you gonna do? " That probably reminds her who she is and should be. After that, we see her picking up Emily at airport, possibly she called her up and reveal the truth as she should in the first place; then she made deal with victoria to tell on boss under sole condition that dom is untouched. She made the right choice eventually, as she used to be. Better late than never, taking responsibility for what she did like a fucking adult. It takes her edge off, which still makes me angry, not at her, but at the fucking real world of ours that rounded with such a flame in the first place. Yet the most helpless as it always was in Effy is the fact that she has to play the help all her life, which means no one helps Her, that she is truly THE most helpless one. That leads to off-putting love affair with her boss. But seriously cut her some slack, please. Leave aside the fact that boss is adulthood look-alike of Freddie, probably an unintended happy coincidence, she's lonely, and extremely so after a load of pressure landed on her, taking care of best friend mentally and financially, watchig them being happy and all that. What do we expect her to do, instead of cutting herself and going mental in the bathroom, isn't it much healthy distraction to find a man to love and entertain a little fantasy that somebody got her back? Dom and Boss, she picked the one who pays her rent, so that Naomi didn't have to. And that, for me, makes character of Eff, most lovable and lamentable beyond all.

The Effy who used to smile her mysterious smiles that says "you don't know me at all", still smiles at us in the end. Is it sort of mock or self mock? for many a thousand viewers shall this, her mock, mock out of their retardness after seeing all she went through still don't see who the hell she is; mock herself from dreaming our world to be hers therefore making effort to it; mock grown-ups down, and others yet ungotten and unborn that shall have cause to curse the city that bereaves her Eden and beloved from earth.

Skins fire comes to an end. The followings, in this order, comes pure and rise. It is interesting to note that in the trailor the order has been rearenged: it should be rise, fire, and pure. That is to say the actually serie begins in the medres, classic order of story telling. And it should be expected to return to rise in a circle, suggesting to a eternal reoccurrence of the proccess. Therefore, we have reasons to believe fire is the brutalest one, perhaps things would pick up tone a bit: in pure, it might smooth out a bit, going for depth; rise probably going to be full of struggles but worth it. But eventually, as the trailor so artisticaly hints at: three individual under one skin, going through phases, transforming into one another's life. Step by step, we walk out of ourself, into hers, into his then eventually back to our own skins. All change and changed utterly, a terrible beauty is born.